Feel what you need to feel

The other day I had the rare opportunity to just sit still in the quiet without any distractions. 

It didn’t take long for me to feel a wave of emotion and I started to cry.

I realised through this experience that too often I turn to things to distract me from my feelings.

The most common distraction being my phone. It is so easy to just pick up the phone and start scrolling. Thus pushing those uncomfortable feelings down where I don’t have to deal with them.

It’s not healthy. 

Feelings need to be felt. 

If we suppress them, they will make their way out eventually in a more dramatic way. 

To be able to sit with the uncomfortable feelings, feel them and express them is so important. 

Feelings are not bad. 

This is something that might be hard for us to accept, especially if we were brought up being punished for expressing “negative” emotions.

Think about it... 

How common is it for children to be scolded or sent to time out for “naughty” behaviour like throwing a tantrum. This sends the message to the child that it’s not ok to express their feelings. 

I think that so many of us were brought up this way and as a result we do struggle to express our negative emotions.

Since I started seeing a psychologist I have become very aware of what my triggers are. Our triggers reveal to us what we need to heal within ourselves. If you are triggered by your children expressing their emotions this could be because you were not allowed to express your emotions as a child.

I highly recommend speaking with a psychologist to anyone who struggles with this kind of thing. 

So many of us have an inner child who is still hurting after all these years. There are therapies and services available to help us soothe and heal our wounded inner child.

I’m grateful for my psychologist and the work we have done to help heal my wounded inner child. It’s not easy. It’s a long process, but it is possible to rewrite your inner dialogue and retrain your brain.

I would love to hear from anyone who has done inner child work and the difference it has made in their life.

It’s never too late to change.

It’s never too late to heal.

It’s never too late to start living the life you want to live.