Happiness

Oscar is now 6 months old and last night I spent some time reflecting on those 6 months. It’s strange because on one hand it feels like it’s gone so quickly and I’m shocked he’s already half a year old! On the other it’s been the slowest and most challenging 6 months of my life 😅

I like journaling because putting my thoughts on paper causes me to reflect more deeply and look for purpose and meaning to the events and circumstances of my life. When I’m writing in my actual journal I like to flick back and compare my situation with my last entry and see how much has changed. Last night I was thinking about my happiness and how lately I haven’t been as happy as I’d like to be. I know that life has ups and downs and we shouldn’t expect to be happy all the time, however, I do think that we have a certain level of control when it comes to our individual happiness.
I read a book once that lists 5 things we should do each day to keep us happy:

🙂 Connect with those around you, and recognise the people in your life who are the cornerstones of your well-being.
🙂 Be active. Find a form of movement and exercise that you enjoy and do it regularly- go for a walk, spend time outside.
🙂 Pay attention to the world around you and the beauty that surrounds you.
🙂 Keep learning. Take up a new subject; rediscover an old passion; repair your bike; sign up for a course; learn a musical instrument.
🙂 Give your time, money, warmth, a smile, a gift, friendship- anything that will add to other people’s lives and help to motivate them to do the same.

When I haven’t been feeling the happiest I like to look back at this list and try to incorporate it better into my day. From experience that last point on the list has brought so much happiness to my life. Some of my happiest moments came from doing something for someone else. When I think back to my mission I always smile because those 18 months were full of selfless service. I experienced moments of pure joy because I was completely focused on helping others.

Just before moving house and having Oscar, I was Relief Society President at church for a short period of time. For those unfamiliar with that term, I was basically in a leadership position where I was responsible for all the women 18 years and over who attended the same church as us. Part of being a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latterday Saints is volunteering to take on different roles and responsibilities within the church. When I was asked to be Relief Society President I was overwhelmed to say the least. I had always viewed this particular role as one of the biggest and most challenging I could be given 😅. I agreed to it because I believe that when the call to serve comes, that it has come from God and He knows me and my capabilities better than I do.
I struggled the whole time I was in that position, but looking back, I really needed those challenges and experiences at that point in my life. I was given opportunities to reach out and help other women and that brought me a lot of happiness.

 Becoming a mother is such a huge change... Physically, Emotionally and Mentally. This little person is completely dependent on you! Especially those first three months (the 4th trimester 😅). That level of dependence forces you to put them first. Everything else can wait. It’s very challenging but can be very rewarding too. There are many times when I’ve felt overwhelmed and like I wanted to “throw in the towel” but my love for this tiny human is so consuming that I literally feel like I would do anything for him and that I love him more than life itself. I don’t think you can comprehend that kind of love until you have a child of your own, I know I didn’t.

Because a baby takes up almost all of your time and attention it is easy to let your own well-being and mental health deteriorate. I don’t think it’s something we even realise is happening a lot of the time. That’s why it’s so important to purposely make time for your self and make sure you do things to keep yourself happy and sane. It’s easier said than done but it doesn’t have to be huge... sometimes just a nice long, hot shower is all I need to start feeling better about things.

After having these kinds of thoughts and reflections I naturally start to make goals and “to do lists”. No matter how sucky life can be it’s important to keep moving forwards. Be grateful for what we have, enjoy the present and try to focus on the positive changes we can make for the future.


Hope you all have a good week
❤️