Skip to main content

The next step



Insomnia, headaches, excessive sweating and diarrhea.

These are some of the side effects I’ve been experiencing since starting medication for my anxiety and depression. 🙃

The insomnia is what has lead me to writing a blog post at 4am. 

My thoughts tend to be deep and reflective when I’m wide awake at this time of morning. At the forefront of my mind is the question: “Is the medication working?” I can’t say I’ve seen a huge difference, but to be honest I don’t really know what to expect. This is all new to me...

Going on medication was a last resort. I’ve been seeing a psychologist and trying my hardest to just “get through to the other side”. I felt like I had tried everything else and things were still not getting better. I was apprehensive, I was scared. I asked a few people I knew who were on medication and they helped me to see the benefits and encouraged me to make that decision.

It’s not like I suddenly feel full of sunshine and rainbows, but I do think things are slowly starting to change within my mind...

Before I started to take the medication I was really in a slump. I was very low. I just had no motivation and nothing excited me anymore. Every day felt the same as the one before. I would wake up, do all the things that needed to be done and just “get through the day”.

 I didn’t want that to be my life anymore! If you haven’t experienced depression before, you might think “just snap out of it!”... If only it were that easy! I needed help. I physically couldn’t do it by myself and I really was trying my hardest.

It’s been about 3 weeks and I’m finally starting to look forward to things again. I’m making plans to do things for myself. I’m laughing more. Enjoying playing with Oscar more. Things don’t feel quite as heavy. 

Upon further reflection I would say yes the medication is working. After Easter I’ll meet with my doctor again to discuss where we go from here...

I was so scared to start medication...scared that once I started I may never stop...scared that it would change who I was...

 I think we fear things we don’t know much about. There still seems to be a lot of shame and stigma when it comes to taking medication for your mental health. I mean I don’t know many people who openly talk about it...But from what I have heard from others, it can truly be a life saver! Why should someone be ashamed for taking something to improve the quality of their life? 

I don’t think that medication on it’s own is the answer to all mental health issues. I think that seeing a psychologist and receiving some kind of therapy is an important part of the process... but sometimes we do need that extra help...sometimes despite all our efforts, the chemicals in our brains are just not quite right and need some intervention.

Yes the side effects can be unpleasant, and perhaps we will need to adjust or switch my medication until we find the right balance... but in simple terms, my spark for life is back and to me that is definitely worth it. 




Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Deep and Meaningful 2am thoughts

  It’s 1:30am and I should be sleeping But I’m wide awake with a million thoughts buzzing around in my head I thought I’d dust off the old blog and type it all out…I enjoy sharing these things with the world Every now and then I scroll back on my old posts and read what “past Jade” had to say about life. I did that this evening and a peculiar thing happened…I feel like it woke up parts of my brain that hadn’t been used for a while… hear me out here, I’m not going cuckoo I swear  😅 “Past Jade” saw the world differently to “Present Jade”. She was a little more naive and optimistic; her thoughts were lighter, happier, more grateful, more spiritual. “Present Jade” seems to be stuck in some unhelpful and unpleasant thought patterns. Life feels heavy and I often feel overwhelmed and unenthused…focused on my problems, not my blessings. Looking back on my life through “Past Jade’s” eyes made me think about things a little differently; challenging the gloomy and self-deprecating thoug...
Post a Comment
Read more

Round and round

I seem to be stuck in a cycle… I’ll be “on top of things” ticking off my to-do list, feeling like things are finally starting to “get better”… Then I start slipping into familiar, unhelpful patterns and get I stuck there, feeling weighed down by life and like nobody understands me or knows how to support me. I’ve put a lot of time, effort and money into trying all sorts of therapies, methods and products that are intended to help me “heal”: Psychologists, life coaches, self-help books, medications, herbal medicines, journallin g, affirmations, yoga & meditation- I feel like I’ve tried everything! But nothing really sticks.  Some things help for a while but I inevitably “give up” and slide right back to where I was at the beginning. It’s incredibly frustrating. It’s hard for me to see any progress when I keep going round in circles.  I know that recovery is a life long journey, that there’s not a “magic pill” that will solve my problems, but it’s hard not to feel discourage...
Post a Comment
Read more

Those little moments that make everything worth it

Today was rough. Saturday has become the day of the week I look forward to most. I’ve started a yoga class and I’m really enjoying it (mostly enjoying the hour and a half to myself to be honest 😅). So it was a good start to the day but after picking up Oscar from his Grandma’s it all went downhill.  Jordan usually finishes work early on Saturday which is another thing I look forward to...Not today 😩 I don’t know why but absolutely everything was upsetting Oscar today. Nothing I did was good enough. Breastfeeding is usually the one thing that will always calm him down but even that wasn’t enough today.  It. was. Driving. Me. Crazy! 🤪 Jordan finally comes home...hallelujah! Pass him the baby! 😂 Baby is happy for a short amount of time while I shower then back to being upset 😩  I’m trying to keep it together because we had planned to go out for dinner (cheat meal after eating healthy all week! 🥳) So I’m going through my wardrobe looking for something nice to...
4 comments
Read more